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  • Future Bride Needs Hair Support

    Hello my beautiful curlies. This is my first time submitting a question in the forum and I need help. I have been transitioning since August 2010 and will be getting married October 2011. Unfortunately my dear fiance and mother do not approve of my decision to go natural. My mother has this idea of, "Why would you chose to do that now?" And my fiance thinks, "Are you going to be able to pull that off at the wedding? Is your hair going to look nappy?" And they both ask me am I sure I don't just want to get a perm for that day. It's heartbreaking to know that the two people I count on the most who support me in everything else, are not supporting me on this. I've pretty much told the both of them that I no longer want to hear their negativity towards a decision I've made that doesn't affect them and that I will not be getting a perm. Since then then they've stopped commenting about how they think this is a bad idea. Does anyone have suggestions for hair styles I can wear that day? I'm desperate! My hair isn't very long. I've been growing it out from a pixie cut. The help you give will be greatly appreciated. It will ease my mind and make me less stressed as I prepare for this wedding.

  • #2
    first off, congratulations! sorry your hair has become the center of what's supposed to be a really exciting time for you

    Curly Nikki highlights natural brides every now and then, and they've had some great styles. here's link to all the past articles: Curly Nikki | Natural Hair Styles and Curly Hair Care: Wedding Hair

    Do you want to wear it longer? Maybe you could get a natural-looking weave for that day.

    I personally think some of the pinned up updos that have been featured on the site have been BEAUTIFUL and would be perfect for a wedding. Here's the thread for those too: Curly Nikki | Natural Hair Styles and Curly Hair Care: Wedding Hair Throw a flower and a veil on that thing, and you would be beautiful.

    It sounds like they just don't understand what being natural is about. There are plenty of ways for you to be "nappy" and absolutely stunning on your wedding day.

    Good luck!
    Last edited by NewlyNaturelle; 04-21-2011, 11:27 AM.
    Finally 100% natural!!
    Last relaxer: 10/8/2010
    Chop date: 3/11/2012
    Hair type: Solid 4a

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    • #3
      I wish it was that easy. I went through this website and showed them both the pictures of the nautral brides on this website and they still didn't like it. I think that's what's making it so hard. I have actively been looking for a style since December that I know everyone will like and I'm hoping to find one soon. My beautician only does natural hair and she is even slightly stumped on what to do. It definitely makes me frustrated at times, but I'm still never getting another perm. I must admit that I was a little envious when I saw all the natural brides say how their husbands wanted them to wear their hair natural for the wedding, even Nikki's husband said it. I'm hoping to find a resolution soon. Also thanks for the well wishes and the links. I appreciate your help so much.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by DancingNaturally View Post
        ...... Is your hair going to look nappy?" And they both ask me am I sure I don't just want to get a perm for that day.

        Sorry for laughing but their reactions are hilarious to me. You sound like you are not 100% sure yourself if you want to wear your hair "natural" that day. Why not compromise? Either have your hair pressed and curled or roller set but by no means get any permanent relaxers (chemical).
        "Remedies from chemicals will never stand in favorable comparison with the products of Nature..." Thomas Edison
        Check out my blog"Green Hair" for information on how to use natural products on natural hair and my YouTube Channel, "GreenHair777"

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        • #5
          Originally posted by DancingNaturally View Post
          I wish it was that easy. I went through this website and showed them both the pictures of the nautral brides on this website and they still didn't like it. I think that's what's making it so hard. I have actively been looking for a style since December that I know everyone will like and I'm hoping to find one soon. My beautician only does natural hair and she is even slightly stumped on what to do. It definitely makes me frustrated at times, but I'm still never getting another perm. I must admit that I was a little envious when I saw all the natural brides say how their husbands wanted them to wear their hair natural for the wedding, even Nikki's husband said it. I'm hoping to find a resolution soon. Also thanks for the well wishes and the links. I appreciate your help so much.
          Geez, that sucks. Yeah, the only thing I can think of is to get braids, a weave, or get an updo with added extensions. Maybe you could get some hair that looks like blown out/straightened natural hair so that it will blend yours. I'm not an expert or anything, but I'm transitioning now too with weaves, and I have one in now that was kinky straight when I put it in, but really curly once the water hit it. I posted a pic of it in the Transitioners area.
          Finally 100% natural!!
          Last relaxer: 10/8/2010
          Chop date: 3/11/2012
          Hair type: Solid 4a

          Comment


          • #6
            What are some of the styles you have been looking at? I think you should just go with what YOU like and not what everyone else likes. It's your day, and I would think that he's marrying you for you and not your hair. It does suck that this is even stressin you out or putting pressure on a time that's supposed to be fun and joyous.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Green Hair View Post
              Sorry for laughing but their reactions are hilarious to me. You sound like you are not 100% sure yourself if you want to wear your hair "natural" that day. Why not compromise? Either have your hair pressed and curled or roller set but by no means get any permanent relaxers (chemical).
              I completely agree!!! Getting your hair pressed doesn't make you less "natural"!!! Don't be discouraged by their stance they will get over it. Just be confident in you!!! I am sure you will be a beautiful bride!

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