Hi curlies. I need to vent.

When hubby quit his job last month, he didn't have a backup plan. Even after seeing me go crazy for 6 months not finding work, he didn't put money aside for "just in case."

I'm now paying the bills for our household and for the most part, have us caught up on everything.

He asked me to pay his cell. Last paycheck, it was his Mom's cable.

I told him I could help him on 2/8 (payday, 2 weeks), but I also have my own bills to pay. He got an extension until 2/1.

I feel bad that I can't help him, but if I don't have it, I don't have it! We still have to eat, I still need gas, and I still have bills to pay.

I don't have a bottomless pit of money. I have to set boundaries, right?

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Happy birthday Butterfly!

Honny alot of men don't plan ahead like most women do. They know it is in our DNA to make sure things are done. Setting boundaries is great!

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Honny, first, venting is good. I think setting boundaries are good, make sure they are very specific so there's no chance for misunderstanding on his part.

<<Hug>>

(((HUGS)))

Vent away Honny!

AJ and Foxxy are right... men definitely have a different thought process.

Talk to him about it... set boundaries and make a plan. You've got enough weight on your shoulders playing catch-up, so don't let this add to it.

Breathe and move on... it's better that he not have money for a cell phone instead of not being able to pay the mortgage/rent. Put things in perspective for him.

He realizes that I have priorities.

I'm due for an upgrade. I was going to treat myself when I got into nursing school, but that didn't happen. Blackberry is coming out with a new family of phones on 1/30. I budgeted to finally get a new phone (new job, new Blackberry) but now I have to pay his cell?!

He's draining me. He's using my car because he ran his into the ground. He complains about the food I buy, but he eats it anyway. He's doing all this work with his business partner, but he's not getting paid.

He really is a good man and I want to help him reach his goals, but this is a bit much!

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Care Free Curl Curl Activator: Moisture, Sealer, Styler

NOT sent from my Blackberry 10 using the CurlyNikki App...there isn't one

Honny Have you expressed how you feel to him? If not, think about the best way to approach the topic and discuss it. Let him know you support his dream but at the same time let him know how you are feeling. I don't think he should be asking you to pay his mother's bill. That it's a bit too much. Momma don't have to have cable!

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Thanks my cyber sisters for all the birthday wishes. It really means a lot. You girls are so sweet!

Honny, my hubby doesn't plan for anything! And to me it's selfish, but the truth is they know they can depend on us. Sorry, I just added to your frustration, but I get it.

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Last Relaxer: 7/10/2010
Big Chop: 02/05/2011
Description: Beautifully Kinky, medium-course with a fine density, low porosity

Foxxy, no I haven't talked to him about it straight up. I just told him that if a bill was due (rent), that was a priority.

Butterfly, you did not add to my frustration! His cell is his livelihood. He'll find a way to get it paid. The entire time that I was unemployed, I never asked him to pay my bills. He will have the same respect for me.

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Pantene Curly Series
Care Free Curl Curl Activator: Moisture, Sealer, Styler

NOT sent from my Blackberry 10 using the CurlyNikki App...there isn't one

Ok, good.

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Last Relaxer: 7/10/2010
Big Chop: 02/05/2011
Description: Beautifully Kinky, medium-course with a fine density, low porosity

Good Saturday Morning Cyber Sistas!
I'm up and getting ready to twist my hair. I did my wash day last night. I used CV Cafe Moreno bar and then the CV Babassu Marshmallow bar to detangle followed by V05 Shea Cashmere to condition. My fro is soft! I'll be doing my Nubian Heritage Indian Tamanu Edge Taming Taffy/ Shea Moisture Curling Souffle mix to use on my hair when I twist it. I'm doing well with the Jamaican Pimento oil. I LOVE that stuff!! It's keeping my hair and scalp VERY happy.

To HonnyBrown:
Sorry you're frustrated. Is it possible that you can get both of your phones on the same plan? Would that save money? My son and I are on the same plan and I don't pay a lot. I happen to have Sprint. Maybe there's a possibility to do that with your cell company? Just a suggestion.

With you getting a new job and him quitting his job, I can see where that would cause friction. I bet you've had your "come to Jesus" moment with him. It sounds like he wants to go into business for himself. Is he amiable to at least getting a part time? Sometimes even part times would help. At least that would help him get some money coming in. Just a suggestion. Not trying to be pushy.

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